I could never say in a 90-second meet-and-greet or in a random, fleeting brush with fame what I was able to say here. I can't believe I'm actually saying this, and some of you will think I have severely misplaced my blockhead priorities, but I would take that single tweet from Donnie over a 5-star VIP ticket any day. Hands down. I am absolutely astounded that my small voice was heard...and based on the flood of feedback that I have received, it is evident that what I said resonated pretty deeply with many people.
There was an overriding theme in your responses. So many of you told me that I wrote YOUR story. Your feelings, your memories, your experience. One fan tweeted, "What I felt after reading your words was relief. I felt relieved knowing that it's documented, even if only in cyberspace. And also relieved that my exact feelings had been expressed and understood."
After reading numerous tweets from you all telling me that you needed a box of kleenex after reading it, my husband shook his head and asked me, "What is the deal with all these crying women?" I had to laugh. The "deal" is that we get a little emotional when we remember that we were all in the same boat back then. And we get a little more emotional when we realize that we climbed back into that boat together. We came full circle. We look a little different now, and have a few other life reponsibilities to manage, but the truth is, people don't really change. I have done a lot of living over the past 20 years, but I am still me. And those five guys - they're still basically the same people, too. Which is one reason why this reunion worked.
Some of you have also shared with me that the blog allowed you to give other non-fans (for lack of a better word) a glimpse into your "blockheadedness," so that they might understand you a little better. I hope it shed some light. But when you get right down to it, the only way to truly understand blockhead-ism is to be one yourself.
On a final note, I have a hopeful suspicion that Jordan Knight read the July 2009 blog, too. Check out this interview, taped this week in Nashville, and between the potato-chip smacking, note his response to the question about the psychology of fans at 1:54:
He says this: "Feelings don't really die. We kind of came on the scene when a lot of our fans were really young...and we were the first boys they ever really had crushes on. And you don't forget that. You don't forget those feelings, either. Those feelings that...they're so strong, that they leave a mark. And we left a positive mark. And we were SAFE for girls to have crushes on us and to feel those feelings toward us." He used the word "safe," the same word I used to develop my point about adolescent crushes. There is no way to know for sure, but I like to think I helped (or at least inspired) Jordan a little bit on his answer. Of course, the other possibility is that he just has an inexplicably remarkable grasp on the inner workings of the mind of a teenage girl, rarely seen in most males. And if that's the case, I'm highly impressed, Jordan.
All of this to say...thank you for that tweet, Donnie Wahlberg. You have no idea how gratified I am to know that I "got through." Somehow you just made up for countless unanswered fan letters from years ago. And if I ever get the chance to tell you that in person one day...well,then...that will just be gravy.
