8.28.2011

You Know You’ve Moved to the Country When…

the garbage collection department tells you not to worry about paying bills on time. “We’re flexible here.”
...men address you as "ma'am." Even if they're older than you.
you discover that the U.S. Postal Service does not deliver to your house.
...road rage never rears its ugly head.
the crickets sound like they have Bose sound systems embedded in their bellies.
you don't just go run some errands. You go “into town.”
...you get attacked by a hummingbird on your front porch.
the handwritten directions say, “Turn right at the first black-top road you see.” (See below.)
blogpic4 blacktop blogpic6 not blacktop
...your church pounds you with non-perishables. And it feels good.
...Starbucks coffee is but a memory.
...a distant rooster crows every morning at dawn.
...downtown shops tune their radios to the country station.
...it's safe.
...the book limit at the library is 6.
...drivers coming in the opposite direction acknowledge you by lifting their pointer finger off the steering wheel as you pass.
someone says to you, “Tell your kids that if they see something that looks like a dog and they want to pet it, they really should ask you first. It might be a coyote.”
...your eating-in bill is higher because your eating-out bill is less.
...the air sometimes has a distinctive, barn-like aroma to it.
...woodland creatures frolic in the front yard like they're auditioning for Disney.
the sky is prettier than it used to be.
...the grocery store sells rooster livers for bait. “NOT EDIBLE” says the sign. Just in case.
And finally, you know you've moved to the country when...
...the fact that there is a Dollar General in town thrills your soul.
God Bless America. And my new town.

1 comment:

  1. I love this! We passed by your town on the way to Opelika from where we live the other day- it was a fast drive by, ha. We also had a pounding - I am a huge fan of that tradition!

    ReplyDelete

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